13 Situations When You Shouldnt Say Im Sorry at Work

13 Situations When You Shouldnt Say Im Sorry at WorkFailing to apologize for your mistakes is a big sin in the workplace. It can cost you good coworker relationshipsor worse, your job. But on the other hand, constantly apologizing, starting sentences with Im sorry or prefacing everything you say with Sorry can make you seem weak, insecure, or indecisive. Politeness is one thing, being a doormat is abedrngnisher. Its also not advisable to use Im sorry as conversation filler, just like you wouldnt use like or um. googletag.cmd.push(function() googletag.display(div-gpt-ad-1467144145037-0) ) Here are 13 particular circumstances in which you should never say Im sorry1. When youre really notsorryPeople can tell when youre being insecure. Just like dogs can smell fear. If your sorry is very clearly sarcastic or insecure, dont even bother saying it.2. When youdidnt do anythingAka when you have nothing to say youre sorry for. Its not polite to throw in a ton of meaningless apologies for norm al things like expressing an opinion or ducking into the restroom.3. When youre sticking to your principlesA coworker, or even your boss, is suggesting you do something off your moral tracks. Its okay to stand up for yourself. You dont need to preface your I dont believe its right to lie cheat/steal/defraud/etc. with an Im sorry. You shouldnt be.4. When its your badYoure late or you didnt finish a project on time. Dont just fling out a Sorry and hope that youll be immediately exculpated. In short dont abdicate your responsibility too often.5. When it plants a bad seedYou may know that you didnt spend quite enough time on that presentation, but theres absolutely no reason to lead it off with that fact and an apology. Do the best with what you have and dont give them a reason to doubt your work before youve managed to present it.6. When youre not prepared to own itSometimes we say sorry and consider it the end of the road. Forgiveness granted If youre going to wield the word, be prepa red for the apology recipient not to get over it immediately. Some mistakes or wounds take time to heal and build back trust. Recognize when someone is perhaps not ready to forgive you.7. When you quitYoure not sorry youre taking another job. If you were, you wouldnt be taking it in the first place. Leading with an apology in this situation also opens the door for your boss to try and guilt you into staying. Better to stand firm and get out the door with good feelings on both sides.8. When you had nothing to do with itIts much better to save your apologies for when you can and should assume 100% responsibility for the situation. Throwing sorrys around about things that were not in your control or in any way your fault will just take power away from you when you need to wield an apology for real.9. When someone asks you to pass their apology alongIf someone tells you to tell someone else that theyre sorry for insert whatever actually bad thing they might have done, just stay out of i t. Pass along the information that so-and-so wanted to say something to them or speak to them, and let it go at that. Dont do their dirty work. If its just an innocent Jane says sorry she couldnt be here shes giving birth to her second child then thats probably panzerschrank to pass along. Just stay away from the hairier stuff.10. When youre in the middle of debateYoure having a heated argument, or a debate full of passion. The last thing you want to do is throw in a sorry to minimize the conflict, i.e. sorry, I just dont agree It weakens your position and it will almost always ring insincere.11. When youre genuinely upsetSomeone does something legitimately upsetting to you or near you. You object. Youre more than justified in calling them out on their behavior. The last thing you want to do here is to say sorry first. Im sorry, but that welches wrong doesnt leave enough room for the actual apology that you should be receiving from the wrong-doer.12. When youre asking for somethingI m sorry, but could you help me with/do for me/save the day is not a good thing to say when asking for help. If you actually felt bad, you wouldnt have asked. Instead, after asking simply, humbly, and clearly, say thank you. Which should be what you really mean to say.13. When the moment has passedEspecially if youve already apologized and everyone is already over it. Dont rehash the past. Move forward If youre really still beating yourself up over something, then put that energy into making sure you never make that mistake again. No need to dredge up old drama. Keep moving forward instead.